We turn two today.
by Kimberly Ang
“Good morning love, and happy two months to us. I’m thankful for every single moment you are in my life.”
This is what I would have said, if I could have the universe still spinning my way. But some days, reality becomes harsher than it just usually is. Your love, or rather the love that I have for you, is no longer this all consuming fire that threatens to burn me if I allow myself to come too close. This love has faded into the background, like a filter on my life. It has changed the way i see things, though nothing alarmingly glaring.
Being with you has allowed me to just be, to never have to try to be anyone but myself when I’m with you. We fall into this synchronised way of being when we are together, we never seem to have anything to stop talking about. All we do is laugh, and laugh. And you know, it does feel amazing to be able to laugh with an unbridled joy, with nothing haunting you at the back of your mind. But that is how I feel with you, I feel like I’m free, like the world could keep on turning and existing but nothing else mattered but the conversations we were having.
So every single time I tell myself to stop there. I tell myself never have to try to define myself or compare myself to the other people in your life because the journey I’ve had with you is nothing, nothing, that they would have experienced. I tell myself to allow us to have all the time in the world because time is what we have.
Or maybe I’ve just come to a point where I love you enough to just want you to be happy at this moment in time, even the difficult things that make me uncomfortable.
Happy monthsary love, that’s what you would’ve said.